mother nature 

june 2017 ::

i came from your pussy –

first one to come from your pussy.

didn’t it hurt when i came from your pussy?

so helpless, all bloody and squishy 

i was screaming and crying.

what a joy ー

you passed me off like a baby doll 

and i am not a toy.

//

you once looked so happy though.

you see, what had happened,

you gave up so quick on ya girl 

i’m not sure if you planned it.

i’m not tripping because 

goddamn girl you so craaazy

and if i was around you more 

i don’t think i’d be this lady.

//

maybe i’d be famished from no love from you. 

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p.s., i’m lactose intolerant but i really like greek yogurt. i usually eat yogurt because it’s painless dairy, but i just tested that theory and it’s not painless anymore.

might get the munchies and eat all the yogurt
used to get high in my grandma’s toyota
i was so reckless and ratchet – i know it
pushing the limits is always a motive
thats how i keep going & going & going
attention span slowing, stimuli more potent
a fountain of youth that somehow’s all-knowing
master of my makebelieve, santigold told me
nobody will ever see things exactly as me,
all of time, this beauty is mine
these eyes mirror my vision
these thoughts mirror my subconscious
these actions mirror my confidence
this energy mirrors my existence
this strength mirrors my persistence
its thursday, 1:34AM on july 6
weekday friends live overseas
weekend friends live in shibuya
thank god its thursday, right?

i’m not being extra. 

had a beautiful cry 

like i had a blade dragged into me to remove a dormant cancer that was hidden & resting but in great magnitude. 

before this cry, i had a productive day.

i laughed and smiled.

i worked on new projects. 

i saw people who i admire.

i had endorphins flowing through my body.

i had a cry @6A after a bike ride home during a call home to my grandmother. 

it was like blockage was removed and resting pain that existed inside me exited in bulk, in the same vain of my living joy. 

i could see myself screaming as babies do when they become aware of the vast world – life replanting me from my comfort zone to one more visibly boundless.

my grandma laughed and said i’m perfect. 

i’m fine, thanks. 

who knows how to feel?

who knows how to deal?

who is made to kill?

i just reach higher.

permanent resident in the sky.

another motherfucker cannot

tell me how to be.

mother earth is dying.

there is no denying.

why am i not crying?

the spirit and quantum

makes me see higher 

than than my eyes.

i take things day to day.

pray with every breath.

prepare for a reality 

of this world with nothing left. 

i say this all with love.

are you fine?

i’m fine.