defensive vulnerability 

numbness exists for sustainability and growth to thrive. the ability to dive deep without sinking has become an adaptable skill that is used quite frequently nowadays. the need to feel is usually relevant within reason. depths are reached and highs are peaked. at each extreme, the apex & abyss, the absence of air allows for a liberating gravitational effect. floatation is all that happens. everything is meditative. hence the presence of numbness. subconsciousness is bliss. elusive soulmates are here then gone. feelings are remembered through tangible sentiments and photographs. lust escapes as masturbation. interactions relived through daydreams and nightmares. heartbreaks are faint and normalized, therefore seemingly extinct. yet, all is retained despite detachment. filtered through the heart and stored in the mind. 

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