vomit

why are so many people so obnoxiously socially awkward? it’s quite comical. I’m on the train, trying to get lost in some new reads that a new friend got me as an early birthday gift, while this guy conducts himself like a hoodrat, vomiting nonsensical tunes out of his mouth in hellacious harmonies. good morning to you too, Los Angeles.

I just finished getting a haircut. oh, but not just an ordinary haircut. this one was done on a Sunday at 9am, for $20 by a Mexican migrant, with a strong dislike for his hometown. I woke up this morning at my friend’s house whose company I enjoy, as well as his taste in literature as I hope to learn more once this dude shuts the fuck up. anyway, I’ve only been awake for 2 hours and it’s already been an eventful day.

I’m thankful for that. although things might not ever be ideal, as I’m ambitious as hell, with high expectations for myself because I know that I’m capable of so much more and determined to learn my own strengths; despite that, I can say that my life is an adventure. my 44 days in California have been an adventure. I’m staying on my cousins couch in Inglewood with less than $500 to my name, working 2 part-time jobs with mediocre wages, questioning my safety on public transportation, meeting weirdos and unicorns, and trying to figure out all the detailed steps it takes to get what I desire in life.

hope I’m not being redundant. this topic is pop. hella pop. it gets stuck in my head and I find myself replaying it over and over again. sometimes I don’t even want to listen to it, but somehow it’s universal. it’s one of those things that connects us all as people — no matter your income, your race, your ethnicity, your social status. we all stop for a second to analyze what more we want out of life.

so I’ve learned to appreciate the simple things, the struggles, the weirdos, the unicorns, the shitty jobs, the shitty pay, the awkward times, the obnoxious fuckers on the train, and all the other in between that occupy my time while I’m living and somehow being distracted from my desires, while working towards satisfying them. appreciate them because they are essentially a part of you. it’s a part of your life experience. we move on from these situations and drift on to new ones and possibly have the same analysis and desire to want more or push yourself further. I just advise to never overlook or take anything for granted.

there’s no guarantee that these unicorns, weirdos, challenges, shortcomings, and such will grace your presence again in the same face they presented themselves. why not try to smile in the face of it while you can and use it all as an opportunity for personal growth and reflection.

I’m just trying to make the best out of it, and I’m thankful that my stop is next, so the passenger with the vocal vomit can stay right on the train, possibly never to be heard again.

living in the moment, yet, also looking forward to the future

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